This session’s objectives
- To understand the indicators of positive, healthy relationships and unhealthy relationships, including online.
- The services available to support healthy relationships and manage unhealthy relationships, and how to access them
What does a healthy relationship mean to you? What is an unhealthy relationship? What is the impact of our behaviour on other people? How can we support somebody we care about?
- Open & Honest
- Where people are supportive of good life choices
- Where there is mutual respect & affection
- Where no one is “using” anyone else.
- When no one is pressurising anyone else
- Where both parties feel loved & cared for
What do you think unhealthy relationships are? What might be an unhealthy way to behave. Discuss in groups of two or three.
Jake’s mum and dad are always arguing at home, so he doesn’t like to be there often, he prefers to hang around with the older lads round by the shop near his house. The lads are nice to him, and they adopt him as their mascot for the group. Jake sees them as his new family. After a few weeks, one of Jake’s mates asks him to do a favour and drop across package across town. Jake knows he does the local graft, but he feels like he owes something to his new mates, so he does it. It gets to be more and more often, and Jake knows the packages are drugs.
Is this a healthy relationship?
No! Jake is being criminally exploited by this group of older boys, for the purposes of trafficking drugs. Although the group began by being nice to Jake, this is what we call the “grooming” stage, where exploiters make young people feel accepted and cared for, to better manipulate them later. Who or what could Jake get support from to leave this difficult situation?
Summer has been with her boyfriend for a few months now and she really likes him. She thinks he’s lovely to her and she loves wearing his oversized hoodies. Summer’s boyfriend wants to have sex with her but she’s still unsure. She’s worried about getting pregnant, even though her boyfriend says he will wear protection. More than that – she doesn’t really want to. She feels uneasy when she thinks about sex with her boyfriend. He keeps going on about it, saying if she loved him, she would.
Is this a healthy relationship?
No! It’s not healthy for Jen’s boyfriend to pressure her to have sex if she doesn’t want to. What advice would you give Jen about that relationship? Think about: Who could support her? What services could help her?
Cara is a Young Carer for her mum as her mum is disabled and she also attends school. She has a large amount of homework to do and she’s falling behind with her maths. She tells her boyfriend that she can’t see him one night, but he shows up at her house anyway. He won’t go away even though she must care for her mum. After her mum is settled for dinner, Cara gives up on her boyfriend going home and they watch a film together. Cara doesn’t have time to do her homework, but has an ok evening.
Is this a healthy relationship?
Not really! Cara said no to him about hanging out and he showed up anyway. Cara tried to send him away and he wouldn’t go. This is not respecting her wants and needs. Although Cara had a nice time, it would have been healthier for her boyfriend to respect her “no” and they could have spent time together another day. What could Cara and her boyfriend do to make their relationship healthier?
One of those examples is not like the others. What if someone you love or care for a lot does something that isn’t “healthy”? What services or support is out there for young people in relationships?
Is it the action or the person?
What did you decide? Everyone has different boundaries and wants/needs in relationships. Bear in mind, there can be people who are unable to have a healthy relationship with young people. Exploiters, for example, like the one who manipulated Jake, are very unlikely to have a positive, healthy relationship with young people. Communication is important and sometimes you may need support to communicate. This is okay! Some people can hear that they have done something wrong, learn from it, and change their behaviour. You never have to give people second chances. Remember your needs, wants and wishes should be respected and prioritised in a healthy relationship.
Group Discussion
What if you care about them but they don’t change their behaviour? What do you think? What if you really care about someone but they keep ignoring your “no”s or using you? How might this make you feel?Remember, you are not alone. If there is a relationship, friendship or person in your life that makes you worry about this, speak to someone safe. You can speak to a teacher, parents or other trusted adults.
SECONDARY - Healthy Relationships 25/26.pptx
Safer Schools - Merseyside Police
Created on January 29, 2025
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Transcript
This session’s objectives
What does a healthy relationship mean to you? What is an unhealthy relationship? What is the impact of our behaviour on other people? How can we support somebody we care about?
What do you think unhealthy relationships are? What might be an unhealthy way to behave. Discuss in groups of two or three.
Jake’s mum and dad are always arguing at home, so he doesn’t like to be there often, he prefers to hang around with the older lads round by the shop near his house. The lads are nice to him, and they adopt him as their mascot for the group. Jake sees them as his new family. After a few weeks, one of Jake’s mates asks him to do a favour and drop across package across town. Jake knows he does the local graft, but he feels like he owes something to his new mates, so he does it. It gets to be more and more often, and Jake knows the packages are drugs.
Is this a healthy relationship?
No! Jake is being criminally exploited by this group of older boys, for the purposes of trafficking drugs. Although the group began by being nice to Jake, this is what we call the “grooming” stage, where exploiters make young people feel accepted and cared for, to better manipulate them later. Who or what could Jake get support from to leave this difficult situation?
Summer has been with her boyfriend for a few months now and she really likes him. She thinks he’s lovely to her and she loves wearing his oversized hoodies. Summer’s boyfriend wants to have sex with her but she’s still unsure. She’s worried about getting pregnant, even though her boyfriend says he will wear protection. More than that – she doesn’t really want to. She feels uneasy when she thinks about sex with her boyfriend. He keeps going on about it, saying if she loved him, she would.
Is this a healthy relationship?
No! It’s not healthy for Jen’s boyfriend to pressure her to have sex if she doesn’t want to. What advice would you give Jen about that relationship? Think about: Who could support her? What services could help her?
Cara is a Young Carer for her mum as her mum is disabled and she also attends school. She has a large amount of homework to do and she’s falling behind with her maths. She tells her boyfriend that she can’t see him one night, but he shows up at her house anyway. He won’t go away even though she must care for her mum. After her mum is settled for dinner, Cara gives up on her boyfriend going home and they watch a film together. Cara doesn’t have time to do her homework, but has an ok evening.
Is this a healthy relationship?
Not really! Cara said no to him about hanging out and he showed up anyway. Cara tried to send him away and he wouldn’t go. This is not respecting her wants and needs. Although Cara had a nice time, it would have been healthier for her boyfriend to respect her “no” and they could have spent time together another day. What could Cara and her boyfriend do to make their relationship healthier?
One of those examples is not like the others. What if someone you love or care for a lot does something that isn’t “healthy”? What services or support is out there for young people in relationships?
Is it the action or the person?
What did you decide? Everyone has different boundaries and wants/needs in relationships. Bear in mind, there can be people who are unable to have a healthy relationship with young people. Exploiters, for example, like the one who manipulated Jake, are very unlikely to have a positive, healthy relationship with young people. Communication is important and sometimes you may need support to communicate. This is okay! Some people can hear that they have done something wrong, learn from it, and change their behaviour. You never have to give people second chances. Remember your needs, wants and wishes should be respected and prioritised in a healthy relationship.
Group Discussion
What if you care about them but they don’t change their behaviour? What do you think? What if you really care about someone but they keep ignoring your “no”s or using you? How might this make you feel?Remember, you are not alone. If there is a relationship, friendship or person in your life that makes you worry about this, speak to someone safe. You can speak to a teacher, parents or other trusted adults.