How to be a great accountability partner

This is an ongoing relationship fueled by personal connection and collaboration and requires that you both "show up". Be dependable when it comes to completing your scheduled check-ins and keeping your partner updated on your own progress. Learn how best to work with each other by completing a User Manual for Me to tell your partner what you need, and also let them know the same about you in return!

We know that time is a precious commodity but, if you can, why not jump onto a call a couple of minutes before a scheduled minute to have a quick chit chat? It’ll reinforce your relationship.

Being truthful with yourself and your partner about the progression of your goals is extremely important for your desired results. Make a deal with your partner to be honest with each other. The journey to holding yourself accountable might be hard, and showing some tough love could be necessary, but if you put in the hard work together, amazing things could happen, too!

Celebrate wins and provide consistent encouragement. When encountering obstacles, provide words of encouragement and solutions to help your partner work through and overcome setbacks.

You’re responsible for fostering a supportive and safe environment free of negative thoughts in which you can both grow and learn.

Your AP might have strengths and weaknesses that differ from your own. If both of you bring unique perspectives to the relationship, this could help you see your challenges in a new light and increase your chances for success. To create an effective partnership, listen to your partner's perspectives and show that you value their feedback. Use active listening skills as they share ideas with you.

Give feedback that provides necessary critique, without bringing your partner down.

Effective partnerships are not about pressuring, shaming, or blaming. If a commitment wasn’t reached, don’t dwell on it. Set another commitment and work on holding to that.

The ideal relationship between accountability partners is not based on giving and following advice, but rather on exploring a range of topics together. “When you are listening very deeply to another person, your own thoughts and concerns quiet down, your ego naps in a corner of your mind. This creates a tremendous space for your [partner] to explore [their] own issues.” (Elena Aguilar, a transformational leadership coach)

A great strategy for becoming a great listener is to focus on asking reflective questions. The goal in asking reflective questions is to assist each other with navigating inner thoughts and experiences, in order to gain deeper clarity and understanding of one’s own thinking. As an accountability partner, you are not a mentor and not necessarily an expert. Your primary role is to draw out, not pour in.